i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
