Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Randomize
