goodnight i made you a song goodbye
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He keeps bees of course he's weird
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
