You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
