He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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