Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
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