I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Can I color on your dick again?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
