you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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