Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
