He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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