I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
