I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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