i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Dignity is for republicans.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
