Kiss
Puke
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Did I show you my penis last night?
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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