I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize