loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
