chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
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