your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
