talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Is it because I queefed?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
