She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Randomize
