it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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