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Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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