I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
