ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
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