i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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