a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i barfeds in our rink
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
