yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
