it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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