She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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