Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
How external is "for external use only"?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
