whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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