Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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