I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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