The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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