he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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