Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
