Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
