Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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