it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
