New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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