Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i dont even know how to be here
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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