dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
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