We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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