Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
