butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
