They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
