I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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