i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Randomize
