Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
