I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
