yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
either way he was missing a nipple.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize